Five years and four months later.
I bought four new tyres and, as I was a sleepy head when I dropped my car off, I also bought wheel balancing and alignment. Later the same day I bought a new battery. When I went to collect my renovated car, nine hours after I left it to be renovated, it was not ready. The whole staff of the garage were involved in "putting it back together".
While it was being test driven the managerial mechanic asked if I had jumper leads at home. (The Owner's Manual cautions against jump-starting my car as it may cause trouble with the computer controlled parts of the car, like the engine. I expect it simultaneously voids the warranty.) He explained the new battery was not quite fully charged but it should charge up when I drove home, and if I could leave the car running for about an hour after I got home it should be okay. When my car came back from being test driven the long-haired mechanic changed the battery. He told me "the new part we installed was faulty"; I believe the "part" is called a battery.
When I released the handbrake to let my car roll out of the garage this morning the new tyres were so grippy it almost didn't roll out of the garage. Then I returned the mobile phone I had found on the passenger seat to the tyre shop.