See You Next Wednesday
Thursday, January 4
 
Ow!

Yesterday the apheresis machine failed to return my corpuscles into my vein. Instead my elbow swelled a bit and the machine beeped in alarm. Last time I failed to bleed enough, from either arm, to fill the sample tubes. The time before that the tubing had a kink in it and less than half the plasma was collected. And the time before that the machine failed to return my corpuscles at all. The loss of corpuscles means my haemoglobin level may not be high enough (130 Earth units) to make a whole blood donation.

“It’s not you, it’s your veins” I have been told. I wonder in what way my veins are not me; and if this is a healthy level of dualism for a medical professional to maintain?
 
Comments:
I must give blood soon.
(While I decide whether or not to go ahead with my next piercing.)
 
I've done the apheresis thing twice now, and I must say I like it more than the standard donation. If only for the fact that someone will bring you a malted chocolate milkshake in exchange for some barely-noticed fluid essences.

Mind you, so far the BloodBot4000 has not popped a sprocket whilst siphoning my vitals, or I might be a little less enamoured of the process.
 
Oh yes, that reminds me that I should donate blood soon.
I have been told that doing weights can help to build up your veins - not sure of the veracity of this though. They often have trouble finding mine.
 
BTW that was me -Shy
 
you can have a chocolate milkshake if you give blood normally, too.
mmmmm chocolate malted.
hopefully the weights thing pans out for me.
mmm weights.
 
Ah, but if you do the apheresis you can have TWO malted chocolate milkshakes!

Now, I am sure, you understand the seductive domination that the VeinSucker Prime exerts over my feeble will.
 
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This may not sound like the snappiest line from 2001: A Space Odyssey (1968), but it evidently caught the imagination of John Landis, who has worked references to a mythical film of this name into most of his own movies - memorably as the grotty British skinflick watched by an assortment of lycanthropes and zombies in the climax of An American Werewolf in Paris [sic] (1981). Ghastly Beyond Belief, Neil Gaiman and Kim Newman

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