See You Next Wednesday
Sunday, January 25
 
Yesterday.

The Muppet Theatre introduced a new pension concession price ticket which went off without a hitch and everybody was happy with it. Now they are introducing a different price for matinees. The idea is almost the same as the pension ticket and it's not difficult. However, J.P. Grosse has decided to make a big thing about the matinee tickets so he can be sure it goes off without a hitch and everybody is happy with it. Not that he doubts our ability to do it. Not that we haven't just done almost exactly the same thing. Not that there was anything wrong with the very similar thing we did recently. His decision is apparently completely motivated by whim or curiosity.

What his curious whim has done is panic the office. Now anybody with any administrative responsibility is sticking their nose into anything they might be responsible for, despite years of trouble free operation without their interest. This has in turn revealed a significant shortfall in the number of people who actually know how the matinee tickets work - it's not rocket surgery, but if you do it wrong people get hurt. Eager to remedy this training need I have been assigned a woodland creature to educate in the ways of the matinee ticket - right here, right now. They could think of no better time to introduce a new actor than during a live operation involving members of the public which is being overseen by the manager.

Anyway, the new matinee ticket prices went off without a hitch and everybody was happy with it - and the woodland creature did not show up for training.
 
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This may not sound like the snappiest line from 2001: A Space Odyssey (1968), but it evidently caught the imagination of John Landis, who has worked references to a mythical film of this name into most of his own movies - memorably as the grotty British skinflick watched by an assortment of lycanthropes and zombies in the climax of An American Werewolf in Paris [sic] (1981). Ghastly Beyond Belief, Neil Gaiman and Kim Newman

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